The other day in the project ...
Max bursts into the meeting room like an angry bear and starts: "Petra, you haven't done your job again! Now my part is falling on my feet and I can't finish my work. And who's in the driver's seat again? Me, of course! As always! Because you just never stick to agreements!"
Max has let off steam and demonstrated to everyone what his opinion of Petra is. Petra reacts promptly with defiant justification. As a result, the work is not finished, Petra no longer talks to Max and an unproductive mood is carried into the team.
What can my contribution as a Scrum Master look like?
Back to the beginning: "You haven't done your job again ..." means: we have unfinished work. But what is Max trying to say, what is he really missing? I ask Max to just give me the facts and to avoid accusations or blame in order to see the causes of the problem. Max: "The list isn't finished and I'm not getting anywhere." I understand: "Max, so it's important to you to have a finished list so that you can finish your work."
I can see that Max is still really angry and ask what he actually needs: "You often have this problem with each other. Are you looking for reliability in general?" I ask him: "Can you imagine approaching Petra openly about the subject of 'reliability'?
Max tries again. This time: "Petra, I've noticed that the list I need isn't ready. It's important to me to keep my promises reliably. Would you be willing to support me by sticking to our agreement?" I also offer both of them a moderated discussion so that they have the opportunity to come to an agreement openly and as equals.
Conclusion:
In an attitude characterized by understanding, it is easier for those involved to develop cooperation in conflict. Beyond "right" and "wrong", the likelihood of achieving joint results increases. Both conflict partners can save face and learn that there can be great quality in conflict if you leave the bear in the forest and talk about your own needs from person to person.
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